Whimsical Wednesday!

Oh my word!I don't have class today..2 canceled, 1 unofficially canceled..this is my very own public holiday..*grin*
Spending the previous night drooling over some heart-warming Korean movie,Taiwan drama and some web-surfing,I ended up dozing off in my cozy bunk bed until it's like noon.*naughty smile*..7th heaven..
I cleaned up some stuff in my room and sits back wondering whether it's nice to study in this cloudy,cool,peaceful day..nah,my heart says "go study!" but my mind is thinking of something else..n tadaa! i'm blogging..again!
so many things to tell,so many stories to write,yet they all are left unsaid and unwritten..Girl,you really need to toughen up a little and be firmer!
Well what's really fancy today is that the short-term freedom that I have feel blessed.haha..still,I need to work on my assignment though..by the way,tonight is kind of big,with this choir meeting,and sketsa sjm..let's hope I'll pass them happily!

All I Could Do Is Cry..

As the old days passed before me
I shuddered,holding back my tears
I smiled,remembering the happy things I do
And great many things I wish I'd been through

As the present days passed by me
I shuddered,holding myself in,not wanting to give up
I struggled to give myself a big,big smile everyday
I trudged along the winding path hoping that I 'll survived..

Standing in the corner,watching the world around me evolving
I wept silently,I cried my heart softly,and foldaway every bitter memories
Keeping them in the very secret corner in me
I hope someday they would burst freely,beautifully..
Leaving no trace,no scars behind..just beautiful memories

I do not have the heart that hates
I do not have the heart that fakes
I do not have the heart that simply go against my faith
But I do have the heart that lives..

A heart that lives is a heart that feels
A heart that feel is harder to heal
And I do not wish for others to pry
That is why all I could do is cry..

My TryOuts..

Penne Bolognese

Fettuccine

In The Mist

A week holiday feels like a blessing to me.Away from the hectic class schedule,away from feeling stuffy,messy,and contaminated.Sometimes staying in a place for too long,repeating the same routine everyday make us feel tired.Tired of everything,just too tired..that eventually we didn't realize that we are far away from our very own selves anymore.The society that we belong in contribute much to this changes,yet still it's up to us on how we reacted to them..and that formed the new us..

We're dragged far away from what we believe,who we were before,and worse,when we're blind enough to see that we are doing things that we used to stand against.
At home,it's a relieve to find my old self again.It gives me such serene and calmness to think clearly what have I done,decisions I've made,stuff I do recently back in college.It looks like I've made a rush decision on certain things..I've been off track from my daily planner,not really up-to-date with my academic studies,and seems like I've put aside my plans and target for the semester for something that I can regard as 'wasting time and money,and energy..It feels like I should have not done it in the first place.

But from those things I should 'not do',I learned great many new things..things I have long forgotten,things I swore myself not to believe in anymore..It's really hard to embraced it once you let it go forever.I never suspected that I'll be in this situation again..It feels like you have to force it in you..no matter how hard you try,you won't feel nothing..am I going to survive this?I feel like I've lost so many things in life,things I should have grasp on it..it's true,life goes on..but you can't just start a new page without even looking back at the past..

Sigh..what kind of person I would be now,and in the coming future?
I never want to know..time will tell..

H1N1 threats!

H1n1 is spreading rapidly,and this pandemic flu has been found lying within the body of my youngest sister.Surprisingly,the whole family is not affected.Mum is in such a hurry now,from home to the hospital everyday since she was admitted.She has been having fever for about a couple of weeks and had been to the hospital for 4 times.Medicine?Tons of them on the microwave oven.She was just 'too smart' not to eat them until she really recovered.She was diagnosed with the flu on 18th August till now..everybody was,and still calling..asking about her being.I'm tired of answering calls for like 24/7 and wear that stupid,tightrope mask each day and wash my hand with that special soap 24/7(my hands looks like 'ikan kering' already).When we went to the hospital yesterday,I was not allowed to even take a peek into her room.Mum almost got hysterical for not being allowed to visit her daughter..that fatso..get well soon,I miss bullying you!
I got to know that the test that got her warded was the influenza A test(she's positive!),H1N1 test is far more expensive,the cost is about RM1000 (private hospitals)..HKL used to do the test test,but they didn't anymore,too expensive I heard.Her doctor said since H1N1 is the 'hotstuff' now,my sister might has been infected.SARS,and other mammals flu may not be the cause..so,influenza A might not be H1N1,but H1N1 is influenza A.. :P
owh,influenza test is about RM 24..cheaper la..and a bit annoying to have cotton bud being poke into your nose..it hurts!

I guess Malaysians haven't been hygienic enough to stop h1n1 from spreading.Look around us,even in shopping malls,bus stations,hospitals,clinics and other public places,those who wear masks are only about 3 out of 10 people...washing their hands?From my limited observation in a day out yesterday,more people do that as quite a lot of places provided soaps and alcoholic hand wash.WHO predicted that about 5 million Malaysians will be infected if steps to prevent them is not taken.So more deaths would be occurring if people simply pretend like nothing serious is taking place in their lives now.

This morning,as I was listening to the radio..mum was talking to one of our neighbour a.k.a. our family friend about taking their daughter to undergo influenza A test.That child was suffering from mild fever,cough and cold for weeks!Worst,she sits next to my sister in class.Guess..their answer are definitely disappointing and a kind of 'weird'
>>We're afraid that our daughter might have H1n1
>>We're afraid that she might get hospitalized
Mum and I were *&^%%$#!(confused)
Totally confused with what they are thinking..is it worth it to their precious daughter's life??Hospitals and doctors don't kill people..what are they afraid of??
I felt sorry for that girl.I knew her since she was like 4 something.She's the same age as my youngest sister and they are BFF~
She's a very responsible,the cleverest,and the most mature child of 12 I've ever heard of..
Mum could not said much,because it's their daughter.She just gave them advice to hurry and bring that girl for treatment.I pray that God will open her parents heart to bring her to the hospital F.A.S.T!!

Well..when things happen,bad things..its only at the end of the road that we realize that a lot of things that we have in life is actually precious,and we tend to take them for granted..

Sigh..

Letting something that is always a part of ourselves out is hard..but somehow we can't hide it..just let it be.

A Blow On The Head

Sometimes we just forget that things we used to say will somehow 'eat' ourselves without us realizing..
When it happens,we will blame others and miraculously do not see that the one who are guilty is OURSELVES..
We blame others for our own fault,our own wrong judgment..
We make bad assumptions without wanting to really know the truth..as if it was a pleasure to do so..we talk,and we talk..
Until one day,when someone blurted out things that we feel we always know by heart..but gradually we then realized we don't know anything about it..it's just for the sake of knowing and saying,but not practicing or absorbing it into our lives..
We are no different than those 'criminals'..
Realizing the truth is bitter but it teaches us what life's like..
Be honest,be truthful..

Beautiful Dreamer

Beautiful dreamer, wake unto me,
Starlight and dewdrops are waiting for thee;
Sounds of the rude world heard in the day,
Lull'd by the moonlight have all pass'd away!

Beautiful dreamer, queen of my song,
List while I woo thee with soft melody;
Gone are the cares of life's busy throng.

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!
Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Beautiful dreamer, out on the sea,
Mermaids are chaunting the wild lorelie;
Over the streamlet vapors are borne,
Waiting to fade at the bright coming morn.

Beautiful dreamer, beam on my heart,
E'en as the morn on the streamlet and sea;
Then will all clouds of sorrow depart,

Beautiful dreamer, awake unto me!

Stephen Foster

HMPH!!~

When things happen out of our control,nothing much we can do..
accept and face it..

Crumbs of Mikey..

Woo..the first proper english song I heard was "You are not Alone" by the late Michael Jackson..
I never take note on Michael Jackson,what he's doing,what's his latest gossip,or how he was going..On the day he died,people kept playing on his songs,and suddenly it seems like everybody was his fan..I preferred to be placid though..Somehow,I felt sorry for him.The whole world were busy mourning for him,gossiping about the cause of his death but what about the time he decided to change the way he looked..If I'm not mistaken,tons of critics were thrown on him regarding his plastic surgery..Lucky that his talent was undeniably superb..he was the pioneer in modern pop music..and as for me,I'm personally grateful to him for 2 of his songs "You are not alone" and the earth song..it was when I first hear those songs that my love in English burst...haha..
Grazie!!

Future Tense..

The statement that would surely be said when I 'balik kampung ' now is 'Wah,tak lama dah,boleh masuk meminang..'
I was like.."wtf.."
Well I am lying if I said that I won't get married..it's something that people do,and eventually I would do also..somehow..(either 'paksa' or 'rela'..LOL!)okay,enough on this 'kawin-kawin' thing..
Well,somehow when it comes to the future,I always imagine that I am living in a condominium,fully furnished,with this classic-modern design.One thing for sure is that I would have a library,a room specially to keep my lovely books (it would be a huge collection of books!)
Then,I would have classic paintings on my wall,a corner filled with classic music collection..but,if I 'm wealthy enough at that time,maybe I won't use any radio or what-so-ever..I'll moved to a more efficient tech..wahaha..canggih!Just hit the buttons and you're into it!
Another thing that shouldn't be missed is the refrigerator..I'll make sure there's plenty of cereals,juice,chocolates,sushi and stuff that are likely chewable in it..my,how tak senonoh..imagining 'peti ais' filled with food..but yeah,I can't help thinking about it..haha..
And since I was a little girl,heavens know how much I always wanted a queen size bed full with soft,plushy pillows..wah!Confirm I tak bangun!
See mum,your girl dreams a lot!!
A bit about my future children..I am thinking to send them to an international school..but is it worth it??One thing is definite though..they need to learn either violin or piano..and go to either ballet or other dance class ...and they must go to KUMON.. XD
My,how hectic their life would be..But it's a must in the future..they will have added values..and not to be left out..they must learn foreign languages too..french,spanish,german..
Gosh,wonder if they will survived it or not..*evil grin*
By then,I wonder how others would look like...Hilarious!
The end.
P/s:Damn..I really talk crap this time!LOL
*Dumb-DuMb*

Greatest Story Ever Told..Oliver James

Thank you for this moment
I've gotta say how beautiful you are
Of all the hopes and dreams I could have prayed for
Here you are
If I could have one dance forever
I would take you by the hand
Tonight it's you and I together
I'm so glad I'm your man
And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
tonight
I don't hear the music
When I'm looking in your eyes
But I feel the rhythm of your body
Close to mine
It's the way we touch, it soothes me
It's the way we'll always be
your kiss your pretty smile
you know i'd die for
oh baby
you're all i need
And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much i really need you
did I tell you that I love you
tonight
tonight
And if I lived a thousand years
You know I never could explain
The way I lost my heart to you
that day
but if destiny decided I should look the other way
then the world would never know
the greatest story ever told
and did I tell you that I love you
just how much I really need you
did I tell you that I love you tonight